Work is CRAZY (hello, January is our SuperBowl!), I am closing on my house in 10 days, moving in 12, I just planned an amazing trip coming up in Feb (yipee- but in the middle of the season?!?!?!?!? Oh wait, I know the reason) and then of course, the marathon, I am slightly overwhelmed, and feeling a little bit... er, distressed.
Saturday was a tough day for running - I felt like crap the whole time - I just couldn't get my legs to move in the right direction... but then we had our honored teammate picnic and I had an amazing talk with Michele, which helped turn me around and got me moving in the right direction.
At the honored teammate picnic, I was reminded WHY we are doing this and WHY we wake up in the morning to run. At the picnic (which wasn't actually a picnic), our honored teammates had the chance to get up and speak about their experience with blood cancer... my team's teammate (sounds funny) got up and told her story and it really hit me hard. She is about my age, and she was diagnosed her senior year of college and didn't get a diagnosis for a long time -- it wasn't a misdiagnosis, but they were telling her that other things were wrong (humm, sound familiar? Throwing up blood = depression according to the ECU doctors...). When she spoke of her frustration for being sick and all she wanted was to feel better - I understood -- I got it - I was there.... not in the same way with the same diagnosis, but when I was sick, ALL I wanted was my life back. All I wanted was to swim and feel normal.
Although our stories are not the same (cancer/blood clot) the things she said hit home. She was stubborn just like me, she went through this horrific experience and came out stronger than she was before.
Hearing her story and then having her stand up in front of a room of 200 strangers and say "thank you for what you are doing. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you" really made me realize that we ARE saving lives. This does make a difference.
Each and every dollar that is donated goes to save someone like her. Or save somebody's father. Or somebody's 3 year old daughter. These are REAL people that we are helping, and everyday that I feel like crap or have a bad run, it is because of them that I am doing this. Yes, I do it for myself to accomplish something I never thought I could, but more so, it is that I do it so others have a chance to live their life. To accomplish their goals. To finish their own marathons. To give them a CHANCE.
I don't know -- that along with Michele's motivational speech to me on the same day, made me run again on Sunday - and granted, I didn't feel great, but my spirit was lifted and I felt BETTER. As we prepare for this weekend's run, I know that as I am struggling and wondering WHY... this will pop in my head and remind me.
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